Yerushalmi Ketubot 13:5 ירושלמי כתובות י״ג:ה׳

MISHNAH: If somebody obligates himself about money for his son-in-law⁹⁰At the time of the preliminary marriage, the father signed a promise to deliver a dowry in a fixed amount before the definitive wedding date. but then goes bankrupt⁹¹This is the meaning of the term in medieval rabbinic and modern Hebrew. “He stretched his foot” might also mean that he ran away; he cannot be found to be asked to fulfill his promise., she must wait until her hair grows white⁹²The bride, being preliminarily married, cannot marry any other man. Since the father did not fulfill his obligation, she cannot sue the groom either for a definitive wedding or for support after 12 months from the preliminary wedding.. Admon says: “If I had obligated myself, I would have to wait until my hair grows white. My father obligated himself, what can I do? Marry definitively or divorce!” Rabban Simeon ben Gamliel said, I am convinced by Admon’s statement.

HALAKHAH: “If somebody obligates himself about money for his son-in-law,” etc. The Mishnah [deals with the case] that he obligated himself in her presence. But if he obligated himself not in her presence, even the rabbis will agree⁹³While one may give a person a benefit without his knowledge, one cannot impose an obligation on him without his knowledge (Mishnah Giṭṭin1:6). This implies in particular that a preliminarily married underage girl, whose father has promised money but has not paid, can always force a divorce once she reaches adulthood and is able to act in her own behalf. (The Babli, 109a, and Tosephta 12:4 hold that the court will intervene on behalf of a minor whose father does not pay and whose groom does not want to marry without money.).

It was stated⁹⁴Tosephta 12:4, Babli 108b.: Rebbi Yose ben Rebbi Jehudah said, Admon and the rabbis did not disagree about one for whom the father had promised money but went bankrupt that she may sit until her hair grows white. Where did they disagree? If she promised herself. Admon says, she might say, “I was of the opinion that my father wants to give, but now my father does not want to give⁹⁵The legal basis for the annulment of the preliminary marriage is the fact that the usual (but not unique) way of executing the marriage is a commercial transaction in which the groom buys the bride’s agreement to the marriage by giving her an object of value (such as a gold ring.) The bride now claims that, if the groom does not want to marry her definitively as is, the transaction is invalid as מִקַּח טָעוּת “a commercial transaction entered into in error.” Since the marriage is no real commercial transaction, it can be dissolved only by a divorce., what can I do? Marry definitively or divorce!” Rabban Simeon ben Gamliel said, I am convinced by Admon’s statement.